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Saturday, August 16th, 2008

Time:1:07 am.


Saturday, July 12th, 2008

Time:12:56 am.
So in the ides of March, I watched 31 Elvis movies in 31 days. I watched Elvis ride motorcycles, join a few circuses, work at a fat camp, unmask villains like Scooby Doo, get thrown into the pool, and outwit the state prosecutors in the court of law. Elvis punched a man in 29 of his 31 movies. In one of the movies he even had a beard. After I watched all the Elvis movies I ate an Elvis Presley sandwich. Not the Fool's Gold Loaf, but we have made plans to make that happen too.

In April, Michelle and I went down to see Kanye West in Tucson before he started calling people squidbrains. Two of my favorite people are Lupe Fiasco and Kanye West, and the show was the most glorious celebration of ego, but so brilliantly performed that you really begin to believe it's true. It was really worth every penny to see the Glow In The Dark Tour. It's not called Glow In The Dark for no reason.

Sometime in May I got engaged to Michelle. The day that I bought her ring, I got a phone call from my credit card company that went like this:

Representative: "Hello, we are calling regarding some recent activity on your account..."

Me: "Oh, I can understand that--"

Representative: "Yes, if you could please verify... we have a charge to Great American Cookie for $2.59... Crescent Jewelers for $2140. A charge to Taco Bell for $5.23 and early in the morning one at a QT for $2.37."

After that I visited Abraham Scott in New York City for about a week. There we visited 111 Archer Avenue not once but twice and also saw the following: Statue of Liberty, Staten Island Ferry, Co-op City, Katz', Tiffany's, Central Park, Brooklyn Bridge, Empire State where King Kong lived, Coney Island, Time Square, Rockefeller Center. We also ate at the Sbarro's where the Fat Boys had all they could eat in Krush Groove. We went to a Yankees game before they tear the joint down, ate a lot of pizza at a Yankees-themed pizzeria, and even got to spend a day with the infamous Noah Scott who was really pumped to see Ground Zero.

I also got to hang out with many of Abe's great friends, some of whom are featured in Belle and Sebastian cover art.

I was on a church softball team for a spring league in which our grossly inferior co-ed team in a men's league escaped the season with one victory. For a team that, by my estimation went about 1-15, it was really immensely enjoyable, and I can't wait to start back up in the fall.

To celebrate our nation's independence, Michelle and I went to San Diego. The always super-accommodating and all around great guy Nick let us stay at his place while we ate Buenos Dias burritos for almost every meal of the weekend. We almost got to do the most fun thing imaginable: go whale watching on a boat, until I realized that the migration season only runs December through April. I was really bummed and almost did not want to go to San Diego, but the consolation prize was seeing a ton of bears at the San Diego Zoo including the following bears: two young grizzly bears, a brown bear who paced back and forth all day long and one time played in the water, at least three panda bears, one of whom dropped a large yellow load, and best of all we saw a polar bear swimming underwater and playing with a water jug and dropping a large load in front of the glass which murked up the water for days.

I really loved the zoo.

Other than that, I still watch roughly 100 movies a week, listen to a lot of Jens Lekman, and am diligently working on my list of the 30 coolest men alive. I'm still trying to make room for Will Smith, but am pretty comfortable with this list so far:

30. Guillermo Del Toro
29. Bo Jackson
28. Lou Reed
27. Vincent Gallo
26. Latarian Milton
25. Jarvis Cocker
24. Malcolm McDowell
23. Vernon H.
22. Rem Koolhaus
21. Wilfred Brimley
20. David Attenborough
19. Charles "Frank Black Francis" Thompson IV
18. Shaquille O'Neal
17. Ken Foree
16. Andre 3000
15. Jack Nicholson
14. Johnny Bench
13. Andy Goldsworthy
12. Peter Bogdanovich
11. Kanye West
10. Bruce Springsteen
9. Iggy Pop
8. Charles Barkley
7. "Beat" Takeshi Kitano
6. Clint Eastwood
5. Jonathan Richman
4. Bob Dylan
3. Prince
2. Sly Stone
1. Muhammad Ali

So I'm pretty sure that brings us up to date. Some days I really do miss the heyday of LJ, and as you can see, I can't really use "growing up" as an excuse. See you in the mix.

(For those of you keeping score at home:

Top 20 Movies of 2006

1 Pan's Labyrinth
2 Children of Men
3 Planet Earth
4 The Devil and Daniel Johnston
5 Superman Returns
6 United 93
7 4
8 The Descent
9 Letters From Iwo Jima
10 When the Levees Broke: A Requiem in Four Acts
11 The Host
12 The Departed
13 The Protector
14 Miami Vice
15 The Amazing Screw-On Head
16 The Death of Mr. Lazarescu
17 Inland Empire
18 Apocalypto
19 Old Joy
20 Tideland

Top 20 Movies of 2007

1 The Darjeeling Limited
2 No Country For Old Men
3 Ratatouille
4 There Will Be Blood
5 Gone Baby Gone
6 The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
7 Into Great Silence
8 Time
9 Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
10 I'm Not There
11 Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
12 28 Weeks Later
13 Paprika
14 Zodiac
15 Zoo
16 Grindhouse: Death Proof
17 Eastern Promises
18 The Last Winter
19 Persepolis
20 Into The Wild


Wednesday, June 20th, 2007

Subject:AFI's Top 100
Time:10:31 pm.
So I was pretty pumped to see AFI's newly updated top 100 American movies of all time tonight. Outside of a few disappointments (like American Graffiti raising even higher, and ridiculous stuff like The Sixth Sense being listed), I was pleased to see some dumb stuff drop significantly (The African Queen) and some of my favorites jump as much as 80 spots (The Searchers, City Lights, The General). Also significant, Intolerance replaced Birth of a Nation and, though I can't prove it (though if you search for "Slap Heard 'Round The World" on Google, my article is the oldest of the four that show up in reference to In The Heat of the Night), I think I was directly quoted.

Anyway, submitted for your approval, here is my list of the top 100 American films of all time (following AFI's rules, and limited to four per director).

100 The Clock (Vincente, Minnelli, 1945)
99 Young Mr. Lincoln (John Ford, 1939)
98 Wuthering Heights (William Wyler, 1939)
97 The Awful Truth (Leo McCarey, 1937)
96 A Streetcar Named Desire (Elia Kazan, 1951)
95 All About Eve (Joseph L. Mankiewicz, 1950)
94 The Graduate (Mike Nochols, 1967)
93 Out of the Past (Jacques Tourneau, 1947)
92 The Thin Man (Paul van Dyke, 1934)
91 Dirty Harry (Don Siegel, 1971)
90 12 Monkeys (Terry Gilliam, 1995)
89 Love Me Tonight (Rouben Mamoulain, 1932)
88 Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs (David Hand, 1937)
87 Raging Bull (Martin Scorsese, 1980)
86 The Ice Storm (Ang Lee, 1997)
85 Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (Michel Gondry, 2004)
84 Foolish Wives (Erich von Stroheim, 1922)
83 A Woman Under The Influence (John Cassavetes, 1974)
82 The Iron Giant (Brad Bird, 1999)
81 Unfaithfully Yours (Preston Sturges, 1948)
80 Singin' In The Rain (Stanley Donen, Gene Kelly, 1952)
79 Only Angels Have Wings (Howard Hawks, 1939)
78 Treasure of the Sierra Madre (John Huston, 1948)
77 Stagecoach (John Ford, 1939)
76 On The Waterfront (Elia Kazan, 1954)
75 Intolerance (D.W. Griffith, 1916)
74 Touch of Evil (Orson Welles, 1958)
73 Do The Right Thing (Spike Lee, 1989)
72 It Happened One Night (Frank Capra, 1934)
71 Fargo (Joel Coen, 1996)
70 Apocalypse Now (Francis Ford Coppola, 1979)
69 All Quiet on the Western Front (Lewis Milestone, 1930)
68 Our Hospitality (John C. Blystone, Buster Keaton, 1923)
67 Double Indemnity (Billy Wilder, 1944)
66 The Lady Eve (Preston Sturges, 1941)
65 The Philadelphia Story (George Cukor, 1940)
64 Paths of Glory (Stanley Kubrick, 1957)
63 Dawn of the Dead (George A. Romero, 1978)
62 Heat (Michael Mann, 1995)
61 McCabe and Mrs. Miller (Robert Altman, 1971)
60 His Girl Friday (Howard Hawks, 1940)
59 Song of the South (Harve Foster, Wilfred Jackson, 1946)
58 The Wizard of Oz (Victor Fleming, 1939)
57 Children of Men (Alfonso Cuarón, 2006)
56 Portrait of Jennie (William Dieterle, 1948)
55 Husbands and Wives (Woody Allen, 1992)
54 Rocky (Sylvester Stalone, 1976)
53 3 Women (Robert Altman, 1977)
52 O Brother Where Art Thou (Joel Coen, 2000)
51 The General (Clyde Bruckman, Buster Keaton, 1927)
50 The Magnificent Ambersons (Orson Welles, 1942)
49 Annie Hall (Woody Allen, 1977)
48 Psycho (Alfred Hitchcock, 1960)
47 Raiders of the Lost Ark (Steven Spielberg, 1981)
46 The Shop Around The Corner (Ernst Lubitsch, 1940)
45 Interiors (Woody Allen, 1978)
44 Cookie's Fortune (Robert Altman, 1999)
43 The Searchers (John Ford, 1956)
42 Freaks (Tod Browning, 1932)
41 High Noon (Fred Zinnemann, 1952)
40 What's Up, Doc? (Peter Bogdanovich, 1972)
39 Ed Wood (Tim Burton, 1994)
38 The Circus (Charles Chaplin, 1928)
37 Buffalo '66 (Vincent Gallo, 1998)
36 All The Real Girls (David Gordon Green, 2003)
35 To Be Or Not To Be (Ernst Lubitsch, 1942)
34 The Incredibles (Brad Bird, 2004)
33 Notorious (Alfred Hitchcock, 1946)
32 Gold Rush (Charles Chaplin, 1925)
31 Night of the Living Dead (George A. Romero, 1968)
30 The Ghost and Mrs. Muir (Joseph L. Mankiewicz, 1947)
29 Gerry (Gus van Sant, 2003)
28 Sunset Blvd. (Billy Wilder, 1950)
27 Elephant (Gus van Sant, 2003)
26 The Shining (Stanley Kubrick, 1980)
25 Barton Fink (Joel Coen, 1991)
24 Sullivan's Travels (Preston Sturges, 1941)
23 The Long Goodbye (Robert Altman, 1973)
22 The Apartment (Billy Wilder, 1960)
21 Stranger Than Paradise (Jim Jarmusch, 1984)
20 The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (Tobe Hooper, 1974)
19 Rear Window (Alfred Hitchcock, 1954)
18 Sunrise (F.W. Murnau, 1927)
17 Sleeping Beauty (Clyde Geronimi, 1959)
16 Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai (Jim Jarmusch, 2000)
15 The New World (Terrence Malick, 2005)
14 My Darling Clementine (John Ford, 1946)
13 Safe (Todd Haynes, 1995)
12 Manhattan (Woody Allen, 1979)
11 City Lights (Charles Chaplin, 1931)
10 Citizen Kane (Orson Welles, 1941)
9 Vertigo (Alfred Hitchcock, 1958)
8 Greed (Erich von Stroheim, 1924)
7 Some Like It Hot (Billy Wilder, 1959)
6 Limelight (Charles Chaplin, 1952)
5 2001: A Space Odyssey (Stanley Kubrick, 1968)
4 Bonnie and Clyde (Arthur Penn, 1967)
3 The Royal Tenenbaums (Wes Anderson, 2001)
2 Sherlock, Jr. (Buster Keaton, 1924)
1 Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned How To Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (Stanley Kubrick, 1964)

Thursday, June 14th, 2007

Time:11:33 pm.

Thursday, October 12th, 2006

Time:10:59 pm.



Tuesday, September 26th, 2006

Time:4:43 am.

Sven Nykvist, R.I.P.

Wednesday, September 20th, 2006

Time:8:43 pm.
My 10 Favorite Current Baseball Players

10. Lance Berkman
9. Jake Peavy
8. Carl Crawford
7. Nick Swisher
6. Roy Oswalt
5. Albert Pujols
4. Miguel Tejada
3. Craig Biggio
2. Ichiro Suzuki
1. Vladimir Guerrero

My 10 Least Favorite Current Baseball Players

10. Russ Ortiz
9. Michael Tucker
8. Luis Gonzalez
7. Mariano Rivera
6. Derek Lowe
5. Richie Sexson
4. Derek Jeter
3. Julian Tavarez
2. Manny Ramirez
1. A.J. Pierzynski

My 10 Favorite All-Time Baseball Players (right now)
For Outstandingness in Athleticism and Professionalism in Baseball and Being All-Around Swell Dudes

Honorable Mention: Bo Jackson
10. Rod Carew
9. Tony Gwynn
8. Jackie Robinson
7. Cal Ripkin Jr.
6. Rube Waddell
5. Lou Gehrig
4. Satchel Paige
3. Nolan Ryan
2. Roberto Clemente
1. Walter Johnson

My 10 Least Favorite All-Time Baseball Players
For All-Around Jerkiness, Hatability, and Marring the Name of Baseball (and in select cases, simply gross ineptitude)

10. Ruben Rivera
This guy will always be remembered for two hilarious events: stealing Derek Jeter's equipment and selling it for personal gain, thus getting VOTED OFF THE TEAM BY THE PLAYERS, and a hilarious baserunning gaffe which remains the stupidest play I have ever seen in my life (Giants vs. Diamondbacks, 2003).

9. Dick Allen
I've felt racism has always marred the Phillies, but playing the race card and being a jerk about it when you are the best player is just as unforgivable.

8. Reggie Smith
For fighting in the stands.

7. Ty Cobb
Biggest jerk and generally disagreeable man ever.

6. Albert Belle

5. Jose Canseco
Hilariously pathetic in retrospect, but I'd never want the guy on my team. Naming names just for a hint of limelight doesn't help the sport or your image.

4. Bret Prinz
As inept as the Diamondbacks' bullpen has been these last few seasons, imagine what they might have been if Prinz was still around (or the vast information available if BretPrinz.com was still around). Always embarassingly painful to watch.

3. Sammy Sosa
Fake charisma, ballooned ego and corked bats.

2. Pete Rose
In my book, any amount of numbers can't undo the unpardonable sin. Ask #1.

1. Hal Chase
Threw games, bet against his own team, won $40,000 betting on the 1919 World Series and was officially banned from baseball for life. Everything baseball stands for!

Thursday, June 29th, 2006

Time:6:54 pm.
Two hilarious stories in one!

So, yesterday I was watching a show about Komodo dragons on Animal Planet and then a dog food
commercial came on featuring Magnetic Fields' "I Think I Need A New Heart".


Some of you may remember from a few years ago that, at one time, I tried to construct a mix CD of what America means to me. We started a new mix project with my friends at work, and suggested this topic again. I reworked what I had before and am quite pleased with the 80-minute result which, astonishingly managed to stay chronological and thematically consistent.

1. Skip James "Devil Got My Woman" (1931)
2. Billie Holiday "Summertime" (1936)
3. Judy Garland "Over The Rainbow" (1939)
4. Woody Guthrie "Tom Joad, Pt. 1" (1940)
5. Johnny Horton "When It's Springtime In Alaska (It's Forty Below)" (1959)
6. Bob Dylan "Song To Woody" (1962)
7. Sam Cooke "A Change Is Gonna Come" (1964)
8. Beach Boys "Good Vibrations" (1966)
9. Louis Armstrong "(What A) Wonderful World" (1968)
10. Simon and Garfunkel "Mrs. Robinson" (1968)
11. Arlo Guthrie "The City of New Orleans" (1972)
12. Randy Newman "Sail Away" (1972)
13. Parliament "Chocolate City" (1975)
14. Bruce Springsteen "Badlands" (1978)
15. The Replacements "Bastards of Young" (1985)
16. Lou Reed "The Last Great American Whale" (1989)
17. Ice Cube "AmeriKKKa's Most Wanted" (1990)
18. Jonathan Richman "Walter Johnson" (1995)
19. Wesley Willis "Rock 'N Roll McDonald's" (1995)
20. OutKast "Gasoline Dreams" (2000)
21. Wilco "Ashes of American Flags" (2002)
22. Frank Black and the Catholics "End of Miles" (2002)
23. Sufjan Stevens "The Star-Spangled Banner" (2005)


Saturday, June 17th, 2006

Time:9:18 pm.
So, I feel kinda like a jerk, but I'm starting to get into Bruce Springsteen... a lot. In fact, I'm starting to get into a number of things that I used to hate. Other than the Boss, I'm starting to get into New Order, Fleetwood Mac and The Smiths, which is ridiculous.

In ninth grade, I was REALLY into R.E.M. I remember sitting around AA English and only talking about "Radio Free Europe" and whatever (even though I mostly just listened to Eponymous) and my T.A. thought I was real cool. There was this other really weird kid named Keith who would only listen to New Order. One of the few memories I have about this kid is that he smashed a caterpillar in his copy of A Tale of Two Cities and it made a huge green stain that stuck several pages together. That year he wrote in my yearbook "Tony, you should listen to better music. Like New Order." Of course, at that time I only knew who New Order was because Frenté covered "Bizarre Love Triangle". So anyway, I'm now taking Keith's advice, but my biggest problem with New Order is that all of their songs don't sound just like "Age of Consent."

But seriously, I've been listening to mega-Springsteen lately.

Just today I was thinking that it is the cruelest irony to have associations with The Magnetic Fields' "Busby Berkeley Dreams"—something I wouldn't have understood at the time. Coincidently (NOT ironically), I have also been getting into Busby Berkeley lately (not gay).


Today I watched five early versions of The Wizard of Oz (disc three of the MGM special edition). Many of them have the best thing ever which is men in hilarious animal costumes, which I would love even more if I never heard about furries. Here is a rundown of what happens in Oz:

1) On three occasions, our heroes are brought to Oz by cyclone.

2) On three occasions, the Wizard is truly powerful (doing such things as putting the wicked witch Mombi in a preservative can, making magical chickens hatch with elephant heads), on one occasion he is a complete fraud and in one version there is no wizard, but a magic cloak.

3) There are tons of hilarious animals: a prince turns into a kangaroo; a human-sized Toto, a cowardly lion, Imogene the cow and a donkey all follow Dorothy to Oz by holding onto a haystack; the Cowardly Lion, the Hungry Tiger, the Lonesome Zoop, the Woozy, and a crow all battle the Rolly Rogues. The Lonesome Zoop totally rules.

4) One time the Wizard goes to Kansas before anyone goes to Oz. Then the scarecrow, tin man and lion aren't characters, but disguises that the farmhands put on to avoid capture.

5) On two occasions children are appointed to rule over Oz, and on two other, the scarecrow becomes the king. On two occasions there is a royal family in Oz, with King Kruel presiding.

6) One time a black characature of a character named Snowball gets to Oz because he flys across the sky and is zapped in the butt by a lightning bolt 100 times.

Oz rules.

Tuesday, June 6th, 2006

Time:6:38 pm.
Richard Roeper on Pixar's new movie, Cars:

"I found it really touching. I mean this is a worthy edition to the great Pixar library."
-- Richard Roeper, EBERT & ROEPER

Thank you, copy edit.

Sunday, May 21st, 2006

Time:7:26 pm.

Saturday, April 29th, 2006

Time:3:37 pm.

Monday, March 20th, 2006

Time:11:22 pm.



Thursday, February 9th, 2006

Time:6:07 pm.
Today we found a working cell phone in the middle of the street. I prank called Uncle Kirk and asked if he had crab legs.

Tuesday, January 31st, 2006

Time:3:45 pm.
So it wasn't enough that 2005 sucked for movies and music, it has now sent a ripple effect into 2006.

Now, first things first, the Oscars always suck so this isn't a surprise. What is hilarious is the praise that Paul Haggis' Crash is still getting. Crash is being heralded as a breakthrough in race relations (much like Brokeback Mountain is being hailed as a breakthrough in gay relations), while really all it does is use "second-class" citizens to play out childish narratives played by petrified stereotypes. And I know "race" and "stereotype" is the "point" (because we're beat over the head), but it is more likely an afterthought in a film that still treats blacks with the most hostility and still makes the middle-easterner the would-be terrorist.

And yet Ebert picks it as his film of the year. Ebert is becoming more and more irrelevant to the point that it offends me. His year-end lists are always capped with movies that I don't believe he honestly likes, but movies that he thinks that you should see because you are white bread middle America who didn't see anything but Harry Potter and Star Wars this year. Because they are in his best political and popular interest to choose.

He is always using ridiculous hyperbole (like calling Wallace & Gromit in the Curse of the Were-Rabbit one of the most "delightful films EVER MADE" [emphasis added]... now, while I would question that statement outright, I even more question why, if it is one of the most delightful movies ever made, that it would be nowhere near your top ten. It is because it isn't as apolitical as Syriana (or for that matter, Good Night, and Good Luck)? Because America would be better if they pondered Brokeback Mountain, which treats homosexuality like a chaste sitcom?

Ebert has a gift for pointing out the movies that are, at their very surface, almost about one issue (that gets all the hype) while entirely missing the subtext. Crash is a race melodrama that falls into the same traps it accuses America of. Or 2004's Million Dollar Baby, a movie about regrets of fatherhood (although both Ebert and the Oscars have written off everything Bill Murray has done in the past five years), presented to us in an obnoxiously conventional, cloying, obvious fashion. Or 2003's Monster, which again purports gay relations and capital punishment, but fails in that, at its crux, it is a movie that believes that, regardless of victim/oppressor ideology, some have more a right to live than others.

Ebert and the Oscars then play their careful balancing act in which they weigh the film's popularity with its perceived quality. More often than not, we are left with, at best, a middlebrow picture.


And now for something that I care about much more than the Oscars, INCREDIBLE ROCK AND ROLL FESTIVALS! Unfortunately, this years Coachella line-up was announced this morning. And it goes a little something like this:

Saturday, April 29:

Depeche Mode, Franz Ferdinand, Sigur Ros, Common, Damian Marley, Atmosphere, Carl Cox, My Morning Jacket, Ladytron, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Tosca, Cat Power, Animal Collective, Hard-Fi, Derrick Carter, Devendra Banhart, She Wants Revenge, The Walkmen, The Juan Maclean, Audio Bullys, Imogen Heap, Lady Sovereign, Deerhoof, The Duke Spirit, Editors, stellastarr*, Lyrics Born, Matt Costa, The New Amsterdams, The Zutons, Platinum Piped Pipers, White Rose Movement, Chris Liberator, Colette, Joey Beltram, Hybrid, Wolfmother, The Like, Living Things, Nine Black Alps, The Section Quartet, Infadels, Youth Group, Shy FX & T Power, Infusion

Sunday, April 30:

Tool, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Bloc Party, Paul Oakenfold, Scissor Sisters, Matisyahu, James Blunt, TV on the Radio, Sleater-Kinney , Mogwai, Coheed and Cambria, Gnarls Barkley, Coldcut, Phoenix, Digable Planets, Amadou & Mariam, Little Louie Vega, Mylo (DJ Set), Seu Jorge, Wolf Parade, The Go! Team, Kaskade, Metric, Art Brut, Dungen, The Dears, Jamie Lidell, The Magic Numbers, Los Amigos Invisibles, Jazzanova, Michael Mayer, Mates of State, Gilles Peterson, Gabriel & Dresden, The Subways, Minus the Bear, Be Your Own Pet, Giant Drag, Kristina Sky, The Octopus Project

A (very short) list of bands that I would be even slightly interested in seeing at this year's Coachella: Franz Ferdinand, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, The Walkmen, Deerhoof, Sleater-Kinney, Art Brut.

Come on guys, Tool? Matisyahu?? COHEED AND CAMBRIA?? I've already seen Sigur Rós, Bloc Party and Common. I don't really care about Franz Ferdinand or Deerhoof. That leaves CYHSY, The Walkmen, Sleater-Kinney and Art Brut. I don't think that cuts it guys. 2006 Coachella looks like a couple of fanboys at Goldenvoice completely dropped the ball (Tool), and then picked up any hyped buzz band of the past year regardless of whether anyone actually cares. I hate to say this, but I am highly doubting whether or not I will attend Coachella this year. This is the most disappointing thing ever.

Tuesday, January 24th, 2006

Time:11:23 pm.
So, on Martin Luther King, Jr. Day Weekend, we went down to Mexico again to build a house. It was pretty sweet even though we all almost died in a savage wind storm that tried to rip the roof off. Most importantly though, I got some sweet video of the three-story house which we happened to be right next to AGAIN. I also got some sweet footage of The Thing? What Is It? The Mystery of the Desert. Hopefully after I figure out some technologicla glitches, I can use my new favorite website YouTube.com and post them for all to see the Structural Marvel, the Eighth Wonder of the World/Third World Wonder.

I have been into one thing lately and that is diet orange soda. I'm a real Diabetic Kel. I also, on a hilarious whim did something last week that I have never done (and never plan to do again) which was buy a scratcher ticket. However, I won a dollar and played again and won another dollar and then used that to buy another orange soda. So I pretty much broke even and got to play two fun games of Basketball Scratchers for free. I don't want to turn into a real Mike Schank so I'm cutting myself off, but my absoulte favorite thing about scratcher tickets which makes me want to play them is that when they put your winning card in the machine it plays a hilarious rendition of "We're In The Money."

Today was a real rockumentary day. I watched (all of) No Direction Home: Bob Dylan, then I watched the Rolling Stones' Charlie Is My Darling on YouTube and then I went to the screening of Coachella. Coachella was kinda awesome, mostly out of personal interest, and was pretty much a fair assessment of the event which meant that a lot of the movie I didn't care too much about (DJ tents, Bright Eyes, robots, etc.). They also completely romanticized Wayne Coyne which isn't how it really went guys. I was hoping that they were reveal the 2006 lineup or something at the event which of course was completely unrealistic thinking on my part. No dice.

OK guys see you later bye.

Time:10:31 pm.
What's up LiveJournal 2006? I haven't updated in a hundred years and LiveJournal made me change my password because it was too easy for robots to guess.

So I guess I should say a few words about 2005. Pretty much, 2005 completely sucked for music and is the worst year since I started caring. There were a few things that I completely loved, but for the most part it was the year that nobody cared to do anything good and people that were great a few years ago dropped bombs. Nevertheless, here is my list of favorites from 2005:

Favorite Albums:

1. Sufjan Stevens - Illinois
2. eels - Blinking Lights and Other Revelations
3. Kanye West - Late Registration
4. M.I.A. - Arular
5. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
6. Art Brut - Bang Bang Rock and Roll
7. The Fiery Furnaces - EP
8. Serena Maneesh - Serena Maneesh
9. The Boy Least Likely To - The Best Party Ever
10. Broken Social Scene - Broken Social Scene
11. British Sea Power - Open Season
12. Spoon - Gimme Fiction
13. The Clientele - Strange Geometry

Most Disappointing Albums of 2005:

7. The White Stripes - Get Behind Me Satan
6. Frank Black - Honeycomb
5. Missy Elliott - The Cookbook
4. The Fiery Furnaces - Rehearsing My Choir
3. ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead - Worlds Apart
2. Weezer - Make Believe
1. Beck - Guero

Favorite Songs of 2005:

20. The Boy Least Likely To - "Be Gentle With Me"
19. The Clientele - "Since K Got Over Me"
18. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - "Let The Cool Godness Rust Away"
17. Stars - "Ageless Beauty"
16. Sufjan Stevens - "Come On! Feel The Illinoise!"
15. British Sea Power - "It Ended on an Oily Stage"
14. Love Is All - "Felt Tip"
13. Amerie - "1 Thing"
12. Bloc Party - "Banquet"
11. Kanye West - "Touch the Sky"
10. Tegan and Sara - "Walking With A Ghost"
9. Gwen Stefani - "Hollaback Girl"
8. The New Pornographers - "Sing Me Spanish Techno"
7. Sufjan Stevens - "Casimir Pulaski Day"
6. Kanye West - "Gold Digger"
5. eels - "Hey Man (Now You're Really Living)"
4. Art Brut - "Emily Kane"
3. M.I.A. - "Galang"
2. Sufjan Stevens - "The Predatory Wasp of the Palisades Is Out To Get Us!"
1. The Arcade Fire - "Rebellion (Lies)"

Favorite Movies of 2005 (that I've seen so far)
(still need to see Junebug, Keane, Tropical Maladay, The White Diamond, The New World and Caché)

1. Grizzly Man
2. Saraband
3. 3-Iron
4. Last Days
5. Nobody Knows
6. Oldboy
7. Head-On
8. King Kong
9. Broken Flowers
10. A History of Violence
11. Forty Shades of Blue
12. No Direction Home: Bob Dylan
13. 2046
14. The Squid and the Whale
15. Batman Begins
16. Spider Forest
17. Ong Bak: The Thai Warrior
18. Sin City
19. Corpse Bride
20. Mr. and Mrs. Smith


Saturday, December 17th, 2005

Time:11:06 pm.
So, I meant to update about this a while ago, but a few weeks ago my girlfriend watched The Act Of Seeing With One's Own Eyes with me. SHE'S A KEEPER!

Friday, December 9th, 2005

Time:10:28 pm.
Inspired by This Bird Has Flown: 40th Anniversary Tribute to Rubber Soul, Mickey, Abe and I decided to draw up our own rules. A remake of Rubber Soul, track by track, each recorded by a different, still-active artist. One of the songs needed to be a joke and one of the songs needed to be a collaboration by artists who have previously worked together. We each came up with individual lists, presented them to each other and then voted on which imaginary track was the best. In the event that we couldn't decide, it would be taken to the LiveJournal community.

Without any further ado, here is our dream Rubber Soul remake tracklist:

1. M.I.A. - "Drive My Car"
2. Jandek - "Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown)"
3. eels - "You Won't See Me"
4. Beck - "Nowhere Man"
5. Iggy Pop & The Stooges - "Think For Yourself"
6. Belle & Sebastian - "The Word"
7. The Strokes - "Michelle"
8. Prince - "What Goes On"
9. Andrew W.K. - "Girl"
10. Tegan & Sara - "I'm Looking Through You"
12. The dB's - "Wait"
13. British Sea Power - "If I Needed Someone"

As you can see, the verdict is still out on "In My Life" and "Run For Your Life". This is where we need your votes.

·"In My Life" to be recorded by either Daniel Johnston, The Magnetic Fields, or Jingle Cats.

·"Run For Your Life" to be recorded by either The Star Spangles, Morrissey, or Frank Black with Eric Drew Feldman.

YOUR IMPUT IS NECESSARY! Please vote for who you would most like to record each of these two tracks.

***Stay tuned for This Bird Can Sing: 39th Anniversary Tribute to Revolver

Monday, November 21st, 2005

Time:6:16 pm.
So pretty much all I've been doing lately is bowling. Last week I went bowling on five different occasions and bowled ten games. The awesome thing about bowling is that there doesn't appear to be any direct correlation between amount of practice and score.

Team Neckbeard, my team at the bookstore is still going strong and has been answering several challenges from new teams. Bowling has now grown to the point where other three-member teams not originally involved are challenging each other. There are at least five teams of three members which totally rules.

My favorite thing about bowling is that everyone's approach can be tremendously different and it doesn't seem to matter at the (severely) amateur level. I love watching other people bowl, and even if a player is good, I will consistently laugh at his hilarious delivery every single time.

We bowled against this one dude who stands as far back from the lane as possible, points one toe and sticks his butt out. He then takes a couple quick twinkle-toe steps before taking some large strides, swinging his right leg behind him and holding it perpendicular to the ground until all the pins have fell. This looks completely the funniest and he is pretty good.

Other bowling celebrities include the one-armed bandit. This guy picks up his ball and frantically wipes it down with a rag. He then picks it up with his right hand and holds it there in position. At this point, his left arm rests against the side of his body and never, ever moves again. It looks dead as he holds the ball in front of him, approaches the lane, swings the ball back very far and follows through. He NEVER uses his left arm, so much so that I thought for a minute that it didn't work until I remembered that he uses it to wipe down his ball after every return. This dude is also pretty good.

The best part about bowling is that there are always Asians there, they are always having a great time and they are completely hilarious. This past week I saw one Asian dude who would take very large, quick steps to the lane, but then place the ball on the right side of the lane very gingerly. By this point the ball has no speed on it, despite his rapid approach. This amazing technique appeared to work for a few times which completely baffled me. Then for the rest of the game it would fall into the right gutter about a quarter of the way down the lane every single time. This dude didn't know much english at all, but he was a great guy to joke around with. Michelle and I also bowled next to a group of three Asians the other night, all three of whom were hilarious and it was awesome to cheer each other on.

Pretty much I've decided that, as evidenced by this past week, bowling is all I want to do (in life).

LiveJournal for HEY YA!.

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